Deep breaths. Crashing heart. Shaking hands. Dry eyes.
Love is a horrendous feeling when it’s given in abundance only to be followed by regret. Regrets.
So many of them.
Late nights, early mornings, waking up to the sun on your face, falling asleep wrapped in your body’s warmth. Regrets. Your fingers on your guitar, mine resting under my chin. My ears- all yours. My heart- all yours. Regrets. 2am food runs, 4am gossip girl sessions, listening to music together. Opening up my heart to you entirely, crying around you, laughing around you, being around you. Major regrets. Being clicked by you, running my fingers through your hair, letting you run yours through mine. Wearing your clothes, never ever changing. Regrets. All of it is meaningless, devoid. Negative. Broken.
If I could remove myself from your life, your memories, I would. If we were in the Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, this is what I would want. To never be known by you, and to never forget your worst.
She has curly hair, beautiful eyes. A lovely soul. She isn’t me. I look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see. You saw it too- didn’t you? You felt it too- didn’t you?
I never want to see you again.
